I've been thinking a lot about love and coexistence lately. Seminary is mostly to blame for this, but my current relationship has contributed as well. I'll address the seminary issue in this post and the relationship issue in the next post.
It all started with Karl Barth. To be honest, I had never heard of this guy before coming to seminary and I'm pretty sure the first time I read his stuff I pronounced his name "barth" not knowing it is actually pronounced "Bart." I think someone else made that mistake before I did, saving me the humiliation of revealing my lack of Barth knowledge. I'm not sure how I managed to grow up in church without being familiar with one of the most important theologians of the 20th century.
We were exposed to a lot of Barth in Systematic Theology I/II our first year, and I got even more of him in year two with Feminist Theologies and Reformed Confessions. He and I got quite acquainted when I used his theology on the Word of God for my final paper in Reformed Confessions. Maybe I didn't do his work justice, but I managed to write on this doctrine in 12 pages while it took him 13 volumes in his uncompleted Church Dogmatics. Not that I'm bragging or anything, but conciseness is good sometimes.
Barth is big on the notion that we are created to be in relationship with one another, not as solitary beings. He states that for us to exist we must coexist with one another, especially in intimate relationships. He was very focused on relationships with men and women, which is great, but I have to disagree with him on two things. First is his assertion that there is order between the genders and that men are ranked higher than women. I respect Barth, but I gotta disagree with him on this sexist notion. Since we're created in the image of God, we're created without rank, because we know in the Trinity there is no rank. If we put a rank on genders, we deny the non-hierarchical nature of God.
My second disagreement with Barth is when he solely focuses on relationships between men and women. I would argue that coexistence and deep love can be found in many types of relationships. I would include homosexual/queer relationships, but I would also say that this deep love can be found in many more forms. I think of the film How to Make and American Quilt which is a beautiful story about the various love relationships we can have: husband/wife, mother/child, sister/sister, and even one story about a woman and stranger she only met for a few hours. I think this understanding can be reassuring to unmarried folks, because it lets them know they are not in some way deficient because they haven't married.
I'm going to give Barth some grace by understanding that he was a product of his time, thus his narrow minded, heteronormative way of thinking. Despite these points of contention, I have to give Barth props for emphasizing this very important matter. I think it's so easy for us to convince ourselves that we're just fine on our own, but that old saying is true. No one is an island. We are relational beings and even the most introverted (myself included) thrive on being in relation with others. I'm grateful for being exposed to his theology which has taught me a great deal about humanity, and myself in particular.
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